She slept with an uneasy feeling. One where the beautiful haze of dreams and hopes had been dashed by a grimy sense of reality.
Which perhaps wasn't a bad thing.
Comparing the reality of those hopes, with the reality of the life she was living right at this moment made her normal seem good.
So good that she felt silly for having hoped and dreamed such things, about such far away places.
Hoping and dreaming are good, she realised, except when hoping and dreaming prevent her from really seeing and appreciating her reality right in this moment.
When she woke, she had a deep sense of appreciation.
For the little house that now felt like hers. For the blue-grey skies she could see from her window. For the space to breathe. For her safety.
And a determination to live here and really see what she had with new eyes.
She was already living the dream, and for now, it had landed her right here.
She reminded herself to truly, deeply appreciate.
And marvelled at the fact it had taken her this long to truly see.
Then she threw a blanket in a basket, piled little ones in the car and headed to the beach.
She had to go see it with new eyes.